Earlier this year, I drove home for Dad’s birthday. It was meant to be a celebration, but with dementia in the picture, nothing stays simple for long.

Tensions were rising. My mum and sister were caught in the kind of emotional back-and-forth that only happens when love meets fear and no one knows quite what to do with either.

And I stepped in.

Not loudly. Not dramatically. Just with calm, clarity, and a voice that didn’t need to be the loudest to be heard.
I laid it out plainly. What we can control. What we can’t. What Dad actually needs.

And for the first time, I felt something shift.
They weren’t just seeing me as the youngest anymore. Or the one who moved away.
They saw me as an adult. Someone who could hold the weight without adding to the chaos.

Living away has given me distance. Not just in kilometres, but in perspective.
And while I didn’t expect to be the one anchoring the conversation, I was ready when it happened.

Dementia changes everything. But it also shows you who can steady the ship.
That weekend, I realised sometimes, it’s me.

If you or someone you love is navigating dementia, you’re not alone.
There are support services that can help — for practical advice, emotional support, or just someone to talk to:

• Dementia Australia – 24/7 support helpline: 1800 100 500
• Carer Gateway – Support for carers of loved ones with dementia
• Alzheimer’s Australia – Information, resources, and community support

Please take care of yourself, this stuff isn’t easy.