Sometimes I’m hard on myself.
Not just in the get your shit together kind of way, but in the way where I feel like I owe the world a version of me that’s always switched on. Motivated. Supportive. Smiling. Wise. Funny. Energising.

And the weird part is, I like being that guy. I like showing up for people. I like being the one who can make things lighter.

But lately I’ve realised something:
That role is heavy.
It costs energy. The kind you don’t always get back. And the moment I’m a little quieter, more inward, or just… tired, people notice.
“What’s wrong?”
“You’re not yourself.”

But what if I am?
What if this is myself, too. Just not the version that’s always performing?
Not broken. Not spiralling. Just… not entertaining you right now.

I’m learning that being someone who lifts others up doesn’t mean I have to live on a stage.
Sometimes, I just want to sit down.

And that should be okay.